The Idiot’s Guide To Everyday Life

23.May.06, 02:56 am
Filed under: Rants, Tidbits About My Life

Ok, I'm only 29-years-old. Is it wrong of me to have ambition left in my life? Is it selfish of me to still have goals to fulfill even though I'm a mother?

I've got 2 small children, who are the love of my life, and I would do anything in the world for them, I do not begrudge them any time that I spend with them that I do not spend with my studies or work. I am taking correspondence courses to get my paralegal certification. It's been a dream of mine for over a decade, but I've never had the chance to fulfill that dream. I'd also love to finish my bachelor's degree in pre-law at some point after I get my certification. I don't know if it'll ever happen, but it's a goal. I think having a personal goal is important. It keeps you focused and motivated. My family and some friends, on the other hand, seem to think that the fact that I want to pursue these goals, when they could end up moving me farther than a half-a-tank of gas from home, is selfish and wrong.

When Jaden was 2, and I was on my own, separated from my brainless ex for a time, and I couldn't find work to support both of us, I moved to Minneapolis, where I had a friend to help me and a great job working in HR for the Target Corp. offices. I was in mgmt, scheduling coordinator for a call center made up of over 500 employees. I made more money at that job than I have at ANY job I've ever held in Oklahoma. But my family told me I was selfish, because I moved away, and Jaden wasn't here with them. Even when I lived here, folks, we didn't see them more than once every few months!! And even then, I felt like they were looking down their noses at me when I did see them.

So tell me, why should what they think matter????? They don't live my life. My cousin, JM, is going back to school to get her Associates degree for sign-language interpretation, so she can get her certification, since she works as an interpreter for Moore schools now and is uncertified. She just wants a raise, basically. Nobody begrudges her going back to school while she's got 2 kids at home. My mother, at 49, is working towards her Master's. She didn't get her Bachelor's until 2 years ago, and she's wanting to teach full time at Rose State, so she's got to either have her Master's or be working towards it. She just wants a pay raise, and everyone congratulated her for her accomplishment and tells her how wonderful it is that she's still trying to better herself. Why can't I get the same respect???

I'm not the only one in my family who has been shunned for moving on. My other cousin, AM, JM's younger sister, who is only 6 months younger than I, has had her Master's for 6 years. She lives in Dallas, and makes good money there. She has 2 children also. Half of our family has given her the same speeches about moving back here so the family can see her kids more.

HELLO PPL!!! The economy is different here than in Dallas, or most other parts of the country. You will NOT find a job here that pays what the same position pays in Dallas!!! Yes, the cost of living is a bit higher, but not when they bought their house, and got a really great deal on it, and have worked things out to where daycare is next to nothing because AM can work from home half the time via computer!!! She only commutes when she has to go interpret on-site!! Some of our family, JM included, said she should move back here because then they could babysit for her, HOW???? everyone in our family works full-time. Even if she got a job here doing the same thing she's doing now, she wouldn't be paid what she's worth. VERY FEW JOBS IN OKLAHOMA PAY THEIR EMPLOYEES WHAT THEY ARE WORTH. THEY DON'T HAVE TO BECAUSE THE ENTIRE ECONOMY HERE IS FULL OF CRAP SO THEY DON'T HAVE TO COMPETE QUITE AS MUCH AS MOST OTHER MAJOR CITIES. Friends in technical fields or professional fields here have searched and searched for better paying jobs, and have come up emptyhanded. Why??? Because NOBODY here will pay what their skills are worth!

This is why I would like to leave. I would like to get out of here. I would like to finish my degree and get the hell out of Dodge, so-to-speak.



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