The Idiot’s Guide To Everyday Life

My night at The Loony Bin…. and then some.
3.Jun.06, 20:53 pm
Filed under: Friends & Fam, Funny Shit, Tidbits About My Life

Last night I went out with my best friend, Sara, and her husband Mike to The Loony Bin Comedy Club. We had dinner at Chelino's on the way there – had to see their fave gay Mexican waiter – and then went for some laughs. We had a great time at the club, but at 1am, none of us were ready to head home yet. Bored in OKC. Oh joy.

I'd never been to a strip club before. They decided they needed to remedy that situation. You must understand, I'm not shy myself, but I just don't feel the need to stare at strangers in the nude, unless it's on a screen in the privacy of my own home. Sara let Mike pick the place – we were all pretty short on cash, so we wanted someplace with no cover – and he chose what is probably the seediest joint in OKC. Valley of the Dolls on SE 59th. Only a few blocks from their house.

We walked in and the girl on stage, I shit you not, had a fat roll tucked into her g-string. Ewwwwww! I would have been perfectly happy walking in, and walking straight through to the exit, but they found a table and Sara and I got a drink. Another of the worst candidates for stripperdom I'd ever seen strolled up and asked us if we'd donate $1 to their music. We all said no, but then Sara & Mike told her it was my first time in a stripclub, so she proceeded to dance for me….. omfg. I could have gone all day and part of the next without that and been perfectly fine. She sat on my lap, right on my pocket, and I had my inhaler in it. I"m sure she hurt her ass, but didn't say anything. I laughed.

Mike and Sara finished smoking and we got up to leave. She told me in Dallas, the girls in the stripclubs at least wore makeup, fixed their hair up nice, and weren't fat like that. She has promised to take me to a REAL stripclub someday. LOL This is sad, considering I"m 5 yrs older than her.

Maybe one day I'll be as experienced as the younger kids! LMFAO


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